Expectancy - Body, Mind, and Spirit:
Conscious Conception & Creative Essence
Mary Ceallaigh & Mother Tree Birth
Consciously preparing for the life of another being (a being who will someday be capable of generating wholeness or
harm, upon the future world) is something that can be prepared for can be an act of love—the greatest gift of love you
can give your baby, yourself and your partner. This-- like all endeavors requires some evaluation, preparation,
dedication and lots of love and laughter to make it a joyful journey.
Your first step along this path to pregnancy is to cultivate self-awareness, heal your primal wounds, and anchor vitality in
your body & mind, so that you may give your as yet unconceived child a much more whole foundation. Your pre-
pregnancy health is the determining baseline for the resources that your child will draw from in the first 12 weeks/ 3
moons of life in the womb, when all major systems are developed --the foundation for a lifetime of health and well-being.
Your intuitive attunement to your own Mother Nature as well as assessing your health, financial, psychological and life
goal readiness will be of great assistance to you. Below are some rituals, thoughtful considerations and habits that will
help you create the loving space to welcome more life into your life, more love into your world.
First off, take an honest inventory of yourself as potential mother, and ask yourself, "Do I feel like a mother to the whole
world?" "When I see a kid who is possibly at-risk in the world, do I generate compassion towards them?" "Do I consider
the impact of my choices and actions on the world family, not just my own?" "Do I feel connected to the world family, all
beings, as a daily part of my existence?" (vasudeva kutumbukum in sanskrit).
As far as adult development goes, universal motherhood and fully-fledged compassion is the sign of a mature adult
(male or female) but few people in today's culture are adults before they conceive (regardless of age).
Do you have enough love to love beyond biology, beyond genetics?
Do you have enough love to slow down your impulses and observe the bigger picture in your life?
Have you fully developed the heart of the adoptive parent - enough to love not only your friend's kids or your nieces or
nephews - but to love children you have never met in your own city and on the other side of the earth?
If you start on that path, you may find it so meaningful and consuming a commitment that the mental craving, emotional
need, or spiritual calling for a biological child may shift and change and loosen up and flow a love you never before
imagined. And, ironically, this state of universal love is the kind of state that attracts more children and projects into our
Though it is socially acceptable to reproduce, if we are just caught up in the basic ego-centered fantasy of having our
partner focus on a dramatic adventure with us, or what our individual offspring might look like, or how our offspring will be
our own emotional possession, how can it be morally and ecologically justifiable to bring forth a new life who will not have
the benefit of our matured wisdom? Do we want to launch children who will have a lot of our "baggage" to contend with,
or do we want to do the work it takes to be fully embodied and wise enough to launch children who will have optimal
beginnings and no unnecessary delays in cultivating their own full capacity?
Below are some further guideposts on the journey to universal motherhood.
It is through our spirituality that we connect with the mystery of conception. Despite knowing all the “scientific” ways in
which conception occurs, it is still only through spiritual terms that we can attempt to understand how this new being
enters our lives. For though it may not matter where this being comes from or how, it is the instinct of our self to know
who we are inviting into our lives at conception and that indeed we are inviting a new being with their own life plan and
their own life purpose. Knowing that conception is a spiritual act is the first truth to a conscious conception.
Eastern science has long identified that in the first 24 hours after conception, the energy matrix or developmental grid of
the child is formed. And from this cellular composition everything grows, in various continual transitions and leaps.
During the entire prenatal period, every maternal thought and every maternal stressor impacts maternal blood chemistry
and thus, her child. In aboriginal cultures, becoming a woman and having your period was an awareness that - at
practically any moment - you might conceive a baby (whether fathered by the moon, as some believed, or by a mortal
man)... Ancient cultures generally supported maternal intuitive living & creative development. Singing/meditation/being in
beautiful inner & outer realms was considered the best possible work a pregnant woman could do - supported by
everyone else, with no other responsibilities or chores beyond her self-chosen ones according to her interests and
Practice to cultivate spiritual alignment with your creative essence:
2. Asking your potential child what their optimal conditions would be, working with that as you mother the world.
3. Journaling (start a sacred journal book about the baby you wish to come)
5. Create an altar that honors your intention for conscious sexuality, self-healing, and conscious conception (be sure
to have a fertility goddess!)
6. Faith practices (blessingway, personal & couple silent meditation).
7. Being in nature, listening to the song of nature
8. Get connected to the moon’s cycle, sychronize your monthly cycle with the moon's cycle (for more on that, see
"Natural Fertility" by Francisca Naish.
9. Communicating with your partner about your intention to conceive together, and exploring the many forms that can
10.Listening to your heart, learning to mother your own heart.
11.Explore what other faiths believe about conception, pregnancy, birth, parenting and how they fit with your beliefs.
Perhaps there’s a hidden insight there!
12. Study up on the ecological impact of adding another human being's carbon footprint to the planet. Learn about low-
impact ways to raise a child with sustainable values.
Our logical brain can be as much hindrance than help to conception. Like the computer that it is, it can come up with mile-
long lists of why getting pregnant is or is not a good idea. It can categorize information and absorb a zillion facts and
figures regarding pregnancy, birth and parenting. And much of the time in current experience, our mental brain gets in
the way of a joyful conception, pregnancy, birth. Understanding first that conception and pregnancy is not a mental act
but a creative one will help you allow the space for conception and turn mental power towards the positive.
Mental ways to prepare/encourage conception/fertility:
1. Research! Read books, articles that expand your spectrum of possibilities on natural conception, pregnancy, birth,
parenting. Get informed about the spectrum beyond the mainstream spectrum: water birth, orgasmic birth, lotus birth,
extended breastfeeding, parent co-op childcare collectives, non-violent communication, social-emotional learning.
2. Track your cycle (learn your unique fertility cycle).
3. Cultivate a quiet, aware mind. Study mindfulness, basic vipassana/insight silent meditation.
4. Review your lifestyle and make changes in your life that create room for baby
5. Do things you are passionate about—passion breeds passion and conception is at its essence an act of passion
6. Make a list of all the ways you think a child will impact your life. Sit with each item until you feel a measure comfort or
“okayness” with each. Being okay with the feeling of uncertainty is good too.
7. Understand everything you can about how pregnancy, birth and child development occur.
8. Recognize that conception is an act of creativity and use your mental powers appropriately.
9. Apply what you learned about project management in school/work to your conception project—planning, preparation,
purpose. Create a birthing intentions list.
10.Distinguish between desire to “have a baby” and “welcome a baby” in your life.
11.Distinguish how you will be defined or define success as a parent.
Concepton, Pregnancy, Birth and Parenting taps a wellspring of emotion. No matter where you are you will have some
feeling about it—and most likely mixed feelings, stemming from past experiences, your birth family, desire, unconscious
feelings. Exploring your feelings as authentically as you can and allowing for the uncovering of unconscious feelings can
help you discover your own readiness for conception or areas of your life that need to be healed, either through the
pregnancy or before it.
1. Talk with a friend about how you would feel if you were pregnant right now.
2. Express your feelings either to your partner by sharing your feelings either in person or with a letter or piece of art.
Seek communication counseling if you need a safe or encouraging environment to do so.
3. Feel your feelings for yourself by writing in a journal, drawing, painting or making a “picture map” by collaging pictures
on a large piece of paper about how you feel about having a baby
4. Talk with your mother and father about your own birth.
5. Be willing to feel old hurts if they still hurt and allow them to be healed now.
6. Write a poem or letter to your baby about how you will feel when she/he arrives.
7. Go to counseling
8. Develop a heart for adoption, which is the heart of the true parent.
9. Watch empowered birth & freebirth films— feel how you feel while watching them
10.Love yourself and your spouse by resolving other issues so that you can be free to open to a new being’s attention.
11.Begin a daily stretching/meditation practice that involves spinal flexion and attunement to your divine self.
Physical Well Being:
Your body carries the innate knowledge of how to create and birth a baby without your mental management. However,
there are things you can do to support your health and fertility to give a baby all the resources it needs to create health.
Thus during the pre-pregnancy phase one should live as if she were already pregnant.
Being that one-third of pregnancies end in miscarriage (about 70% in the first two-weeks after conception), accept all the
possibilities that may be ahead of you, and make peace with the fact of unexpecteds and things beyond your control.
~ Tell your body it is okay, in fact you will be filled with joy, if you conceive. You may have been telling your body “no” for
so long that it needs a mental “yes” to respond to physiologically (thus the high rate of pregnancies after adoptions).
~ Optimize Nutrition: Eat primarily whole & wild foods (fruits, vegetables, grains, & only organic poultry, fish, meat, dairy).
Cut out all fast food and packaged snack foods. Pay attention to how you eat, and how much vitality is in your food.
~ Include moderate-generous amounts of ghee/clarified butter and coconut oil in your daily diet for deep tissue health
~ Include dietary or supplements of Omega-3 fatty acids found in raw seed oils and full-spectrum Vitamin E
~Be well hydrated with pure water (and the addition of lemon juice, sea salt, and raw honey to hydrate your cells even
more deeply). Your blood supply increases by almost 50% and baby is in need of lots of fresh clean water for the
amniotic fluid, placental and tissue functioning.
~ Learn Mayan Abdominal self-care massage or have belly massages by a trained practitioner.
~ Address any muscle adhesions from childhood injuries that may be creating torsion or stress in your biomechanical
structure. Consult a specialist physical therapist or bodyworker in the A.R.T. (active release therapy) technique to
optimize this healing which will help your body's future mobility as a pregnant woman and lifelong mother.
~ Avoid alcohol, drugs, smoke, caffeine, raw/uncooked meat, radiation, aspirin, laxatives, antacids, hormones (included
in commercial meats too), vaccines, heavy metals, pesticides, fumes, contact with cat feces, acutane. Clean out your
system of any toxins that may be hindering implantation.
~ Address any addictions or addictive tendencies. Choose a partner who is also doing this.
~ If you use prescription anti-depressants, you are not ready to conceive. Address the root causes of the
neuroemotional imbalance and nurture your re-entry into your body so that you can offer your pregnancy & birthing your
full presence and sustainable bonding.
~ If you feel or know that something physical might be in the way, such as low sperm count, blocked fallopian tubes,
adhesions, etc., see a healing practitioner (such as an eastern medicine doctor or yoga teacher) to address this.
~ Exercise at least 3-4 times a week with moderate intensity (a 2 mile walk, an hour of yoga, martial arts, cycling).
~ Explore the most natural, non-invasive therapies first and make medical intervention and pharmacueticals your last
resort if any. Drugs can manipulate your body in an irreversible way and make it harder for your body to respond to
herbs and other natural remedies.
~ Get all major dental work done prior to pregnancy by a biological dentist who will expose you to minimal toxins.
Consider having any mercury fillings removed.
Social Well Being:
Social wellbeing for conscious conception pertains to your social as well as political experience of conception and birth.
Clearing yourself of unconscious social messages about what “ought” to be done may create the space for you to
experience your own true path to conception
...Become aware of your hidden or not-so-hidden assumptions and perceptions about conception, pregnancy, birth and
...Rid your environment of as many negative messages regarding conception, birth, pregnancy, sexuality, women’s
bodies, and parenting as you can. Choose a partner who has done the same.
...Attend women's yoga classes and/or other spiritual women's community groups
...Learn more about your family's cultural roots and myths, and your stories about conception, pregnancy, childbirth.
...Get to know where you stand politically/spiritually/sexually regarding current birth practices, parenting.
...Serve the world family by caring for other's babies and young children as an auntie, nanny, preschool teacher,
volunteer postpartum doula. Be a mother in your community by organizing for positive change. Volunteer with the
Mother-Friendly Childbirth Initiative to improve maternity environments & leading-edge care in hospitals and clinics.
Herbal Allies for Fertility
Herbs to be used alone or in combination:
Drinking a pregnancy/fertility tea daily will double your chances of conception
Take 2 organic Dong Quai capsules 3X a day, EXCEPT during menstruation
MEN: take 2 Ginseng or Saw Palmetto capsules daily, from a high quality herbal supplier.
Evening Primrose Oil - helps to increase fertile quality cervical fluid and also contains essential fatty acids which are
good for the brain. Take from menstruation to ovulation. *It's important to switch to Hemp or LInseed Oil after ovulation.
which contain the fatty acids needed to maintain a healthy lifestyle. Evening Primrose Oil causes uterine contractions -
which is why you should not take it after ovulation in the event that conception did occur.
Red Raspberry Leaf - take during the entire cycle - strengthens the uterine lining, thus helping to lengthen the luteal
phase. (Should be discontinued on confirmation of pregnancy, can be restarted in 7th month of pregnancy)
Take liquid Floradix Iron with herbs, following dosage recommendations
Take Fertiltiy Tonic daily. Capsules: two 3X a day Tincture: 1/4 tsp daily(you may be able to find a similar combination in
your local health food store)
4 parts rehmania
2 parts false unicorn root
1 part astragalus
3 parts wild yam root
1 part dong quai root
1 part vitex berries
Fertile Female Tea
3 parts wild yam root
a pinch of stevia
2 parts licorice root
1 part ginger root
4 parts sassafras back of root
1 part cinnamon bark
1 part vitex
1/2 part false unicorn root
1/2 part dong quai
1/4 part orange peel
Day 1 (first day of bleeding) - Day 5 of cycle: No herbs, gives body a chance to naturally use herbs that have already
been taken, and gives your body a break from processing herbs in a time of detoxification.
Day 6 until Ovulation
Dong Quai (hormone regulator, blood thinner) Red Raspberry Leaf (uterine tonic, hormone regulator Vitex
(Chasteberry) (uterine tonic, hormone regulator)
Ovulation to end of cycle/first day of bleeding
A 'Female Harmony' tonic (women's multi-herb formula, all around supplement)
with Vitex (Chasteberry) and Wild Yam (promotes production of progesterone in second half of the cycle. Also known as
a contraceptive. Should not be taken before ovulation, as it may delay or prevent ovulation.)